This song, called "Oh Jessica", is performed to one of the tunes from Castlevania II. I won't bother posting the lyrics because they're so embarrassingly bad.

(I must retract my earlier promise of no joke lyrics, these are so awful that they can't be anything but a joke. I wanted to write real lyrics for this song, but these just came to me like most of my lyrics do, while I was mowing the lawn, and I couldn't deny them.)

"Jessica" is the name of a girl I knew in high school, whom I never dated and with whom I shared absolutely nothing memorable enough to write a song about, except that her name is the right number of syllables for this song.

I wouldn't use the name of my wife, or any member of my family, or a friend, or a co-worker, or anybody I remotely care about for a song this stupid.

http://www.cba.ua.edu/~matt2/flvxx/8bit/oh_jessica.mp3

Warning: this is a much more guitar-oriented song than the last one. Wankery ahoy!

PS, Brandon: yes, that Jessica. The one who was your wife in Great Quest III.